Do It For Me Now

This is a song by The band Angels & Airwaves. The lyrics are fucking incredible !! I thought i really should share it. It's not new, but just amazing !!

Written By Tom Delonge aswel, and that man is a legend !

'I'm Frightened at night and the wind has a roar,

It seeps through the hall and through under the door,

Like the shit that was said,

I can't take it that well,

I give and i give and give and i give and i'm still,

Lost and bone thin from the love that's been starved,

I know it got close but i'm sure it's too far,

From the point of suspence, we know it should be,

The end of that part of our favourite movie,

When the guy grabs the girl, and give her his hand,

Says take me away from this tourturous land,

Cause the grave is set up, the hole that i dug,

I gave and i gave and i gave and i gave you my trust,

Like the time that we kissed and you gave me a lie,

To add to the scene you pretended to cry,

But i'm here and i'm cool, the way that it is,

Just give me a chance and i'll try to forgive.

And i don't know,

And i can't guess,

If it's gonna be okay,

But now my last wish,

Is that you do it with me,

Kiss me here, and hold my hand,

Let me feel like i'm the only one,

I know you can,

Won't you do it for me now.

I've really had it with the rain of the tears,

The predictable storm that has come every year,

And it sneaks in from shore with a bat in it's hand,

i'm trying i'm trying i'm trying i'm trying i can't,

You're a theif and a witch, but i love you to death,

You steal my heart and curse under you're breath,

But the one thing that i can most willingly prove,

Is that when you are gone, i'll be fine without you.

And i don't know,

And i can't guess,

If it's gonna be okay,

But now my last wish,

Is that you do this with me,

Kiss me here and hold my hand,

Let me feel like i'm the only one,

I know you can,

Will you do this for me now.'

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

Do It For Me Now

This is a song by The band Angels & Airwaves. The lyrics are fucking incredible !! I thought i really should share it. It's not new, but just amazing !!

Written By Tom Delonge aswel, and that man is a legend !

'I'm Frightened at night and the wind has a roar,

It seeps through the hall and through under the door,

Like the shit that was said,

I can't take it that well,

I give and i give and give and i give and i'm still,

Lost and bone thin from the love that's been starved,

I know it got close but i'm sure it's too far,

From the point of suspence, we know it should be,

The end of that part of our favourite movie,

When the guy grabs the girl, and give her his hand,

Says take me away from this tourturous land,

Cause the grave is set up, the hole that i dug,

I gave and i gave and i gave and i gave you my trust,

Like the time that we kissed and you gave me a lie,

To add to the scene you pretended to cry,

But i'm here and i'm cool, the way that it is,

Just give me a chance and i'll try to forgive.

And i don't know,

And i can't guess,

If it's gonna be okay,

But now my last wish,

Is that you do it with me,

Kiss me here, and hold my hand,

Let me feel like i'm the only one,

I know you can,

Won't you do it for me now.

I've really had it with the rain of the tears,

The predictable storm that has come every year,

And it sneaks in from shore with a bat in it's hand,

i'm trying i'm trying i'm trying i'm trying i can't,

You're a theif and a witch, but i love you to death,

You steal my heart and curse under you're breath,

But the one thing that i can most willingly prove,

Is that when you are gone, i'll be fine without you.

And i don't know,

And i can't guess,

If it's gonna be okay,

But now my last wish,

Is that you do this with me,

Kiss me here and hold my hand,

Let me feel like i'm the only one,

I know you can,

Will you do this for me now.'

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

A quick follow up

Just to inform the good people who take the time to read these ramblings, I did end up getting a jacket last week :D if u remember that I was having quite a dilema over whether I should or shouldn't.

As it happens, I struck gold and got a jacket better then the first one, for a lesser price :P Down from £300 to £100 !!! Can't say no to a bargain like that :/ Its a lovely leather jacket like, all snug and warm too :)

That's that sorted then. If y'all get lucky I might get some photos of my good self wearin it uploaded... Maybe ;)

I'll be talkin to ya XxX

A quick follow up

Just to inform the good people who take the time to read these ramblings, I did end up getting a jacket last week :D if u remember that I was having quite a dilema over whether I should or shouldn't.

As it happens, I struck gold and got a jacket better then the first one, for a lesser price :P Down from £300 to £100 !!! Can't say no to a bargain like that :/ Its a lovely leather jacket like, all snug and warm too :)

That's that sorted then. If y'all get lucky I might get some photos of my good self wearin it uploaded... Maybe ;)

I'll be talkin to ya XxX

Pick up point !

Hey there !

I've just endured a fairly boring and quiet three weeks. As previously stated it's been a tad shite, not completely rubbish, but just a wee bit uneventful on the whole.

Anyway, todays sunday and starting tomorrow is the week that i earmarked a while back for things to start picking up again. So i hope to fuck they do haha, if not i'll be right pisssed off.

Nothing planned yet though, (excluding a champions league qualier for celtic) So gotta pray that the powers that be, kick things into gear !

Ti Amo ...

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Pick up point !

Hey there !

I've just endured a fairly boring and quiet three weeks. As previously stated it's been a tad shite, not completely rubbish, but just a wee bit uneventful on the whole.

Anyway, todays sunday and starting tomorrow is the week that i earmarked a while back for things to start picking up again. So i hope to fuck they do haha, if not i'll be right pisssed off.

Nothing planned yet though, (excluding a champions league qualier for celtic) So gotta pray that the powers that be, kick things into gear !

Ti Amo ...

I'll be talkin to ya xx

22.07.

This date last year could possibly be the best day of my life..... I just didn't realise it at the time.

Castles, Chris Rock, Texts, Webams, The Dark Knight, Geeks, Blue shoes, Lifehouse, Bracelets, Chillis, Kisses, Knees, Hard Rock Cafe, Princess Street Gardens, Anne Hathaway, Abercrombie, Disney, Don Henley, White Calvin Klein tops, Sex and the City, Fast Cars, Drops Of Jupiter, Phone Bills, Ray Bans, Pirates, Perth, Castles, Lakesides, Trampolines, Cowards, Turtles, Sudamerica, Trains, Skype, Marriot, The Breakfast Club, Pink, Daughtry, There You'll Be, Chris Brown, Stars, Airports, Blueberries, Self Help Books, TGI Fridays, Long Walks, Charlie Bartlett, Moon Sparkle Perfume,American Physco, Adidas Victory League Deodorant, Spanish, Emails, Baba O Reily, Letters, Stand By Me, Art Galleries, Costa, 26 Bus, Journey.

Just A Few things.......

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

22.07.

This date last year could possibly be the best day of my life..... I just didn't realise it at the time.

Castles, Chris Rock, Texts, Webams, The Dark Knight, Geeks, Blue shoes, Lifehouse, Bracelets, Chillis, Kisses, Knees, Hard Rock Cafe, Princess Street Gardens, Anne Hathaway, Abercrombie, Disney, Don Henley, White Calvin Klein tops, Sex and the City, Fast Cars, Drops Of Jupiter, Phone Bills, Ray Bans, Pirates, Perth, Castles, Lakesides, Trampolines, Cowards, Turtles, Sudamerica, Trains, Skype, Marriot, The Breakfast Club, Pink, Daughtry, There You'll Be, Chris Brown, Stars, Airports, Blueberries, Self Help Books, TGI Fridays, Long Walks, Charlie Bartlett, Moon Sparkle Perfume,American Physco, Adidas Victory League Deodorant, Spanish, Emails, Baba O Reily, Letters, Stand By Me, Art Galleries, Costa, 26 Bus, Journey.

Just A Few things.......

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

Iconic

Rest In Piece Good Sir XxXxX

Iconic

Rest In Piece Good Sir XxXxX

Happy Dark Knight Day

I'm a day late, but i was buzy yesterday so sorry.

One year ago yesterday (July 18th 2008) Saw the release of one of the most brilliant films ever made, and to date the second most succesful..... Christopher Nolan's 'The Dark Knight'.

I'll get it out the way early, the film is amazing, the cast is fantastic, and the late Heath Ledger as the Joker is the best individual performance in a movie for decades ! Ledger was a favourite of mine for a long time and the devestation of his death ramped the longing for this film up even more. However some background info best be given....

To say i was obssessed would be mild term. From the moment the Joker card was turned over in the final seconds of 'Batman Begins' and i left that theatre (In 2005) I couldn't wait for the follow up, the sequal. And so began a very long but ultimatley rewarding 3 years. From the moment that the wheels started runnign on the movie, all the way through casting, to filming begining to the first iconic image of Ledgers Joker. I was there all the way, feeling like a part of the thing itself.

After 3 years of waiting and reading the internet everday (Mention for http://www.batman-on-film.com/.. Best Bat-site on the web) I booked my tickets for the Imax screening at 3:20 Pm, at the Imax screen, at point Orlando. I booked those tickets a month in advance, on the night before my birthday actually (memorable for another reason to be truthful) And finally i was reay to go, one month till i would be sitting there !

The day arrived. 18th July 2008. Me, Dad, Bob and Greig, had a wee drink in the hooters bar just across from the cinema and then sauntered over, in pissing rain may i add. There we had to que for about half an hour, i was close to peeing myself with excitement frankly. Finally we all got in, got seated and waited.

Then the lights dimmed, everybody drew breath, and 3 years of excitement came to a close...

And it was worth every moment of it !

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

Happy Dark Knight Day

I'm a day late, but i was buzy yesterday so sorry.

One year ago yesterday (July 18th 2008) Saw the release of one of the most brilliant films ever made, and to date the second most succesful..... Christopher Nolan's 'The Dark Knight'.

I'll get it out the way early, the film is amazing, the cast is fantastic, and the late Heath Ledger as the Joker is the best individual performance in a movie for decades ! Ledger was a favourite of mine for a long time and the devestation of his death ramped the longing for this film up even more. However some background info best be given....

To say i was obssessed would be mild term. From the moment the Joker card was turned over in the final seconds of 'Batman Begins' and i left that theatre (In 2005) I couldn't wait for the follow up, the sequal. And so began a very long but ultimatley rewarding 3 years. From the moment that the wheels started runnign on the movie, all the way through casting, to filming begining to the first iconic image of Ledgers Joker. I was there all the way, feeling like a part of the thing itself.

After 3 years of waiting and reading the internet everday (Mention for http://www.batman-on-film.com/.. Best Bat-site on the web) I booked my tickets for the Imax screening at 3:20 Pm, at the Imax screen, at point Orlando. I booked those tickets a month in advance, on the night before my birthday actually (memorable for another reason to be truthful) And finally i was reay to go, one month till i would be sitting there !

The day arrived. 18th July 2008. Me, Dad, Bob and Greig, had a wee drink in the hooters bar just across from the cinema and then sauntered over, in pissing rain may i add. There we had to que for about half an hour, i was close to peeing myself with excitement frankly. Finally we all got in, got seated and waited.

Then the lights dimmed, everybody drew breath, and 3 years of excitement came to a close...

And it was worth every moment of it !

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

Want, Want, want !

Right ! I'm annoyed.....

In the FCUK shop on George street i have seen the nicest jacket in the world ever ! And i really, really want it. However theirs only one left in my size and i din't think it'll be there much longer. It's meant to be £310 but it's on sale down to £120. Whilst this is still a shit load of money, it's sorta reasonable and totally worth it.

So what's the problem you cry ! Well... I have no job or source of income. It was my birthday last month, so i have enough money to buy the thing, but i'm also due to go on holiday to Italy next month, and i will need some spending money. Dad said he'd give me a loan to get it, once i had a job, but it doesn't look like i'll be getting one anytime soon... Booooooooooooo !!! :(

So i'm pretty much humped. Not much chance of me gettin this jacket, damm shame, unless i just go buy it and pray that my luck changes before Italy... Hmmmm....

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Want, Want, want !

Right ! I'm annoyed.....

In the FCUK shop on George street i have seen the nicest jacket in the world ever ! And i really, really want it. However theirs only one left in my size and i din't think it'll be there much longer. It's meant to be £310 but it's on sale down to £120. Whilst this is still a shit load of money, it's sorta reasonable and totally worth it.

So what's the problem you cry ! Well... I have no job or source of income. It was my birthday last month, so i have enough money to buy the thing, but i'm also due to go on holiday to Italy next month, and i will need some spending money. Dad said he'd give me a loan to get it, once i had a job, but it doesn't look like i'll be getting one anytime soon... Booooooooooooo !!! :(

So i'm pretty much humped. Not much chance of me gettin this jacket, damm shame, unless i just go buy it and pray that my luck changes before Italy... Hmmmm....

I'll be talkin to ya xx

What To Do

I Am so bored it's just silly !

It's like i've suddenly just ran out of things to do, i can't explain it. Like the last few weeks i've had this feeling of something is just around the corner, something really good and fun, but that's dissapeared, the excitement has went, pretty much case fuck all has happened. I mean, i could try and make use of my time more contructivly, but ehhh, can't be arsed really !

Last night was really good actually, saw Harry Potter (No.6) Then had a belter of a walk with two of the bestests, so that was like a nice wee bit of fun in an otherwise long list of boring nights. I've been doing stuff like ! Was at a Bruce Springsteen concert tuesday which was class, but what i mean is, i'm wanting somthing social a chance to meet new people, a party or just a night out y'know ! But can't see it occuring for a good long time yet ! Damm Shame.

Ooh aye, and contact is like non-existant with She who must not be named.... That i can fix though ! But do i want to.... ?

Oooh well, nighty, night. Look with your heart. Eyes are blind.

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

What To Do

I Am so bored it's just silly !

It's like i've suddenly just ran out of things to do, i can't explain it. Like the last few weeks i've had this feeling of something is just around the corner, something really good and fun, but that's dissapeared, the excitement has went, pretty much case fuck all has happened. I mean, i could try and make use of my time more contructivly, but ehhh, can't be arsed really !

Last night was really good actually, saw Harry Potter (No.6) Then had a belter of a walk with two of the bestests, so that was like a nice wee bit of fun in an otherwise long list of boring nights. I've been doing stuff like ! Was at a Bruce Springsteen concert tuesday which was class, but what i mean is, i'm wanting somthing social a chance to meet new people, a party or just a night out y'know ! But can't see it occuring for a good long time yet ! Damm Shame.

Ooh aye, and contact is like non-existant with She who must not be named.... That i can fix though ! But do i want to.... ?

Oooh well, nighty, night. Look with your heart. Eyes are blind.

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

It's Forever

' When the people we love are takin from us, the only to way to keep them alive is to never stop loving them.

Buildings burn, People die....

But real love, last's forever...'

(The Crow)

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

It's Forever

' When the people we love are takin from us, the only to way to keep them alive is to never stop loving them.

Buildings burn, People die....

But real love, last's forever...'

(The Crow)

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx

Capture It

Have you ever experienced something that to you felt soo perfect that nothing in the world would be able to ruin ot for you ? That put you right at the top of the world, with nothing but sheer excitement driving you on.I'm sure everybody feels that way at some stage.

If you don't i'm sorry, you truely are missing out. Thing is though, nothing can last forever, and at some stage all good things will end. The trick is though, too never let yourself forget, try and remind yourself of how those moments made you feel, and what actually made them so special.

This picture is one of those rare examples of a photo that was completely spontanious and unplanned, yet managed to capture soo much of everything that was being felt at the time. It's beautiful and something that can be looked back on, reminding me of a better time. Funny to think that it was less then a year ago. It feels like i was a differant person entirely. Maybe i am ?

The picture captures the moment perfectly, the sheer, raw affection and power that a person can feel, It is really beautiful. Just a portrait of the simplicity and complexity that comes with the feeling of love.

My advice to anybody is no matter what happens, never forget those moments, people can enter and leave your life, and it hurts when they do. But the worst part, the real pain comes from forgetting. Never forget !
Please, don't let it fade !

I don't want to forget....I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

Capture It

Have you ever experienced something that to you felt soo perfect that nothing in the world would be able to ruin ot for you ? That put you right at the top of the world, with nothing but sheer excitement driving you on.I'm sure everybody feels that way at some stage.

If you don't i'm sorry, you truely are missing out. Thing is though, nothing can last forever, and at some stage all good things will end. The trick is though, too never let yourself forget, try and remind yourself of how those moments made you feel, and what actually made them so special.

This picture is one of those rare examples of a photo that was completely spontanious and unplanned, yet managed to capture soo much of everything that was being felt at the time. It's beautiful and something that can be looked back on, reminding me of a better time. Funny to think that it was less then a year ago. It feels like i was a differant person entirely. Maybe i am ?

The picture captures the moment perfectly, the sheer, raw affection and power that a person can feel, It is really beautiful. Just a portrait of the simplicity and complexity that comes with the feeling of love.

My advice to anybody is no matter what happens, never forget those moments, people can enter and leave your life, and it hurts when they do. But the worst part, the real pain comes from forgetting. Never forget !
Please, don't let it fade !

I don't want to forget....I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

My top 10 Film list

Let's play a little game shall we !

I'm going to list my top ten films ..... Afterwards i'm gonna ask everybody who just happens to read this little blog to leave a comment with your top 10.

Think of it as a social experiment, i want to see if i can tell anything about a person by there favourites films. Play along kids, it'll only take a few minutes !

Cheers :)

Right so.....

10. Chasing Amy (Kevin Smith)

9. Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist (Peter Sollett)

8. Forrest Gump (Robert Zemeckis)

7. The Dark Knight (Christopher Nolan)

6. Ferris Beullers Day Off ( John Hughes)

5. Juno ( Jason Reitman)

4. Good Will Hunting (Gus Van Saint)

3. The Creature From The Black Lagoon (Jack Arnold)

2. The Goonies (Richard Donner) / Stand By Me (Rob Reiner).... I Really Can't Decide here

1. The Breakfast Club (John Hughes)

That was harder then i thought !!!

Honourable mentions have to go to.....

My Own Private Idaho, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Brokeback Mountain, One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest, Batman Begins, Enchanted, Rebel Without A Cause, Charlie Bartlett, Finding Nemo, The Hangover, Biloxi Blues, Titanic, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Trading Places, Requim For A Dream, The Thomas Crown Affair, Ali, Donnie Darko, Edwards Scissorhands, Animal House, Scream, Fight Club, Peter Pan (animated one), The Untouchables, Manhatten, Abbot And Costello Meet Frankenstein, Ghostbusters, Nosferatu, Man On The Moon, The Crow and Annie Hall.

I could name loads others, but i'll leave it there :)

Over to you now... Surprise me .....

I'll be talkin to ya xxx

My top 10 Film list

Let's play a little game shall we !

I'm going to list my top ten films ..... Afterwards i'm gonna ask everybody who just happens to read this little blog to leave a comment with your top 10.

Think of it as a social experiment, i want to see if i can tell anything about a person by there favourites films. Play along kids, it'll only take a few minutes !

Cheers :)

Right so.....

10. Chasing Amy (Kevin Smith)

9. Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist (Peter Sollett)

8. Forrest Gump (Robert Zemeckis)

7. The Dark Knight (Christopher Nolan)

6. Ferris Beullers Day Off ( John Hughes)

5. Juno ( Jason Reitman)

4. Good Will Hunting (Gus Van Saint)

3. The Creature From The Black Lagoon (Jack Arnold)

2. The Goonies (Richard Donner) / Stand By Me (Rob Reiner).... I Really Can't Decide here

1. The Breakfast Club (John Hughes)

That was harder then i thought !!!

Honourable mentions have to go to.....

My Own Private Idaho, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Brokeback Mountain, One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest, Batman Begins, Enchanted, Rebel Without A Cause, Charlie Bartlett, Finding Nemo, The Hangover, Biloxi Blues, Titanic, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Trading Places, Requim For A Dream, The Thomas Crown Affair, Ali, Donnie Darko, Edwards Scissorhands, Animal House, Scream, Fight Club, Peter Pan (animated one), The Untouchables, Manhatten, Abbot And Costello Meet Frankenstein, Ghostbusters, Nosferatu, Man On The Moon, The Crow and Annie Hall.

I could name loads others, but i'll leave it there :)

Over to you now... Surprise me .....

I'll be talkin to ya xxx

A Ghost

I'm floating,

Between life and death,

All i can do do is keep watching,

Keep Hoping,

That it will all work out,

I want to be alone,

But i need others,

Wishing To stand under it all,

And look upon the world,

Only when my heart can't break,

Because I feel nothing at all....

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

A Ghost

I'm floating,

Between life and death,

All i can do do is keep watching,

Keep Hoping,

That it will all work out,

I want to be alone,

But i need others,

Wishing To stand under it all,

And look upon the world,

Only when my heart can't break,

Because I feel nothing at all....

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xxx

Public Enemies !

Went to the pictures to see Public Enemies last night. It's Johnny Depp's new film which is usually a good sign, plus The steady and dependable Christian Bale. Also has The French actress who won the Oscar a few years ago, Marioun Coultard or something, and someother good people to. Geovanni Ribisi and Channung Tatum to name a few :)

I went in with high hopes, not just cause of a fondness for the lead in it, but also cause i love this entire period of history, depression era America, were criminals knew how to be bad ! None of the shitty, pathetic criminals we've got these days !

Anyway, well i found it to absouloutly fantastic ! The only slight issue was that maybe it was 20 minutes or so too long, but every minute is good enogh that the majority of intelligent people will stay entertained and enthralled. The Director (Michael Mann, btw) has used a clever technique for the big action scenes which is right effective aswel, he's removed the celuloid from the camera, essentially putting the film straight onto digital and giving those momnets a somewhat home-made, realistic feel. Very smart, will probably be use by countless others soon, but to not quite the same standard ! Haha

The film also ranks as one of the single most quotable movies i've ever seen ! Just about every scene has at least one fantastic peice of dialogue. Even the late Clark Gable gets in a few very poignant lines, in a scene when Depp's Dillenger is viewing an Old Gable film at the cinema. Pretty cool :)

Oooh well, that's really i have to say about anything just now, Go see the film folks, it's a belter !

Be Safe, Be Lawful...

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Public Enemies !

Went to the pictures to see Public Enemies last night. It's Johnny Depp's new film which is usually a good sign, plus The steady and dependable Christian Bale. Also has The French actress who won the Oscar a few years ago, Marioun Coultard or something, and someother good people to. Geovanni Ribisi and Channung Tatum to name a few :)

I went in with high hopes, not just cause of a fondness for the lead in it, but also cause i love this entire period of history, depression era America, were criminals knew how to be bad ! None of the shitty, pathetic criminals we've got these days !

Anyway, well i found it to absouloutly fantastic ! The only slight issue was that maybe it was 20 minutes or so too long, but every minute is good enogh that the majority of intelligent people will stay entertained and enthralled. The Director (Michael Mann, btw) has used a clever technique for the big action scenes which is right effective aswel, he's removed the celuloid from the camera, essentially putting the film straight onto digital and giving those momnets a somewhat home-made, realistic feel. Very smart, will probably be use by countless others soon, but to not quite the same standard ! Haha

The film also ranks as one of the single most quotable movies i've ever seen ! Just about every scene has at least one fantastic peice of dialogue. Even the late Clark Gable gets in a few very poignant lines, in a scene when Depp's Dillenger is viewing an Old Gable film at the cinema. Pretty cool :)

Oooh well, that's really i have to say about anything just now, Go see the film folks, it's a belter !

Be Safe, Be Lawful...

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Addictive

So today i finally accepted that fact that i have a seriuosly addictive personality. I've always known it, just never properly realised the actualy extent to which it goes. Y'see today i had my second driving lesson. Their going quite well, i can do it, just nott to a great level like ! But if i needed to i could jump in a car and go someplace, which is nice feeling i suppose. Anyway, even though i've only had 4 hours worth of time driving, i'm begining to feel a desire to do it alot more, i'm enjoying it and therefore i just want to keep doing it, even though i know i can't ! Like whenever i'm in a car i just want to have a shot myself, even though in all honousty in could well end up with me dying a slow, mangled death but ahh well. But that's precisly what i'm getting at, i feel the need to keep going, even though i shouldn't. My boundaries scattered all other the gaff !

Like if i think about it, this addictive personality, shows up in sooo many aspects of my life it's not realy, my addiction to the feeling of love has been well documented in the past on this and yeah it the same kinda thing. I enjoy the feeling i get when i feel close to a female, and therefore i crave that emotion. Creating it for myself in situations that it probably doesn't belong or need to be. But i just can't help it.

Theirs loads of other cases of it two. Like my walking around at night, those wee wanderings just started as a way to clear my head months back, but now i'm actually craving them, i feel sometimes that i ned to leave the house or wherever i am, and just walk in the darkness, sticking to shadows, feeling all alone and safe with myself and my mind. It's silly but i really do feel almost under pressure sometimes to satisfy this urge.

The sleeping pill addiction aswel. Whilst not affecting in too severe a way as of yet, i'm fully aware that it can have bad effects at some point down the line. That's why i'm really making efforts at stubbing that one out as quickly as possible, which, whilst being easier said then done, in all eventualities must stop soon, simply as my supply is very low, and the family are already getting slightly suspicious. So hopefully i'll solve that soon.

Theirs been loads more through the windy road i tenuously call my life. The 'Ol slash-slash problem which popped up about two years ago and occasionally rears it's head when the time suits, could count as an addiction, in the context that after the first time it happens, you feel better, therefore keep going with it. I'm smart with that though, i know how to play that game, few years behind me on that as it goes. Not proud however !

But that's the thing, my whole life, i've found that the minute i enjoy something or have a good thing going on, i just can't throw it away or let it go, i crave it, and then ruthlessly try and re-create it in any manner possible, often with bad effects. From the small things to the big fucking issues, it's something that i suppos ei'll have to deal with.

To be truthfull i'm sure plenty folk have a similar problem, and it's not too difficult to deal with, just as long as i avoid the real dangerous shit. Cause i know i'll be caught, hook, line and sinker ! Fucker

Right well there yi go, i apologise, another rambling, angsty, me, me, me, bullshit rant about my daft wee problems ! Haha. As it goes though, i'm surpringsingly happy just now ! Totally shouldn't be, having a shit time in general, but i'm dealing with it. Congrats !

By th eway, second time i've written all this out, last time it cyber fucked me and didn't post. See... I'm dedicted !

Anyway, game over. Be good and be lawful peoples.

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Addictive

So today i finally accepted that fact that i have a seriuosly addictive personality. I've always known it, just never properly realised the actualy extent to which it goes. Y'see today i had my second driving lesson. Their going quite well, i can do it, just nott to a great level like ! But if i needed to i could jump in a car and go someplace, which is nice feeling i suppose. Anyway, even though i've only had 4 hours worth of time driving, i'm begining to feel a desire to do it alot more, i'm enjoying it and therefore i just want to keep doing it, even though i know i can't ! Like whenever i'm in a car i just want to have a shot myself, even though in all honousty in could well end up with me dying a slow, mangled death but ahh well. But that's precisly what i'm getting at, i feel the need to keep going, even though i shouldn't. My boundaries scattered all other the gaff !

Like if i think about it, this addictive personality, shows up in sooo many aspects of my life it's not realy, my addiction to the feeling of love has been well documented in the past on this and yeah it the same kinda thing. I enjoy the feeling i get when i feel close to a female, and therefore i crave that emotion. Creating it for myself in situations that it probably doesn't belong or need to be. But i just can't help it.

Theirs loads of other cases of it two. Like my walking around at night, those wee wanderings just started as a way to clear my head months back, but now i'm actually craving them, i feel sometimes that i ned to leave the house or wherever i am, and just walk in the darkness, sticking to shadows, feeling all alone and safe with myself and my mind. It's silly but i really do feel almost under pressure sometimes to satisfy this urge.

The sleeping pill addiction aswel. Whilst not affecting in too severe a way as of yet, i'm fully aware that it can have bad effects at some point down the line. That's why i'm really making efforts at stubbing that one out as quickly as possible, which, whilst being easier said then done, in all eventualities must stop soon, simply as my supply is very low, and the family are already getting slightly suspicious. So hopefully i'll solve that soon.

Theirs been loads more through the windy road i tenuously call my life. The 'Ol slash-slash problem which popped up about two years ago and occasionally rears it's head when the time suits, could count as an addiction, in the context that after the first time it happens, you feel better, therefore keep going with it. I'm smart with that though, i know how to play that game, few years behind me on that as it goes. Not proud however !

But that's the thing, my whole life, i've found that the minute i enjoy something or have a good thing going on, i just can't throw it away or let it go, i crave it, and then ruthlessly try and re-create it in any manner possible, often with bad effects. From the small things to the big fucking issues, it's something that i suppos ei'll have to deal with.

To be truthfull i'm sure plenty folk have a similar problem, and it's not too difficult to deal with, just as long as i avoid the real dangerous shit. Cause i know i'll be caught, hook, line and sinker ! Fucker

Right well there yi go, i apologise, another rambling, angsty, me, me, me, bullshit rant about my daft wee problems ! Haha. As it goes though, i'm surpringsingly happy just now ! Totally shouldn't be, having a shit time in general, but i'm dealing with it. Congrats !

By th eway, second time i've written all this out, last time it cyber fucked me and didn't post. See... I'm dedicted !

Anyway, game over. Be good and be lawful peoples.

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Aw fuck Right Of !

I just wrote a masive big thing and then it said error and didn't post and i lost it. Fuck you Blogger, you nasty cunt you !

I'll be talkin to ya xx

Aw fuck Right Of !

I just wrote a masive big thing and then it said error and didn't post and i lost it. Fuck you Blogger, you nasty cunt you !

I'll be talkin to ya xx