Take My Breath Away, I'm A Supernova....

Update time. Nothing new really, just the same old, same old. There lies the problem, in having nothing groundbreaking occur it feels like a lot has happend. You live, you learn. Isn't that right. Aww who knows ! Basicly i'm fucking fed-up ... Again ! It's feeling like the constant tide has more or les just settled for now, i honestly can't see anything, or make that anyone (maybe) on the horizon. And that never bodes well for me does it ?

If things aren't in flux i'm fucked (could be a new motta that) and it's leading up to that. I had plans, great big fucking ambitious plans, for the start of this uni year, but by this point already, it's mostly fallen by the wayside. Everyone has found a groove, a rythm and a purpose. And i'm feeling kinda left out, i'm not soo much integral as external. I don't really need to be there now. I have nothing to pull me in. There are literaly people who want me to just fuck of, just get ghost. And yeah i deserve it ! i feel fucking bad. i say the wrong things, at the wrong times. I'm relentless in my constant pursuit of something better, the next big chapter so to speak. And in doing so maybe i do bulldose over the few people who i should stop and thank and then apologise too. The under-appreciated. I genuinally am kept sane by these mofo's and the only credit i ever give back is by walking all over them at every opportunity. Act first, feel bad later ! That's total bullshit isn't it ! All i can say is that i mean well, but in a fight between doing the right thing, and engaging my massive fucking ego, i constantly lose track of what is happening. And then spend days regreting it. Feeling a complete and utter wanker ! I am trying now though, i am doing my best to be good. I like being good to people. It makes me feel decent and also i enjoy it. in the right company, i find everything fun. This week i've smiled more then i have for a long, long time. And two people are to thank for that. I wish i could than them both. He knows, of course he does. That boy is like my emotional barrier, he keeps me safe so he does. She has everyright to murder me, but still tries to be nice to me ! I honestly don't get it ! I don't deserve shit ! But i get to hear nice things, and she should be thanked, and loved. But i don't have the balls to say that, or even show that. Except maybe here. Maybe ?

What the fuck else then... Could the apprentice be moving on from the master, and in doing so, taking some of his ideas with him. Surely not ! Well..... ? I'm not so sure, the banker, the one i was sure of, ever so sure. My first priority if you will... BOOM ! Looks to be gone, swept up in a cloud of him ! I don't get it, i'm happy about it though, i don't deserve another go at that game, and this guy is awesome. He's far more inclined to not fuck it up so all the best, i'm gonna make this happen for you sir, even if i'm lost in the muck doing it. But i'm not gonna be sitting on my ass waiting on any runner up prize. Not at all, when the shit hits the fan (And when does it never) there will be a new competition, and a new numero uno. What i couldn't possibly say ! But i'll cross that bridge only when the paths flooded, at the moment the land seems firm. But for how much longer ? Theres gotta be something coming soon.... A Big black cloud of mystery. Or atleast a sniff of a chase. That is all it takes, get me to engage, and i can still run with the best of them. I don't think my confidence has ever been this fucking low. I can barely look in the mirror without wanting to punch myself (Which i done by the way, and yes it does fucking hurt !) i've annoyed me. It's like everything that i had going for me has pissed of someplace, i'm no longer commanding attention, the interest, the questions have been replaced by a kinda nonchelance. Yes that's him, yeah we know and yup we think he's a cock too. Sums up the worlds approach to the Steve dilemma at this moment in hstory.

This can all of course change fast though, fast like the flash ! I just need a change of some sort, a slight rumble in the jungle. And all will be back to usual. I just wanna be able to say 'Steve is back' and that will be a god damm relief ! It has been too long now, i've just been a shadow of what i was, and this shit doesn't sit well. I suppose its time to find some confidence. Wait for it, it's coming... i know it ! It always is, lull before a storm. Perhaps ? I hope so, i need so. So time to introduce a little anarchy, time to let chaos come down on all this. And maybe, just maybe, it's that time again. To set the mother fucking house on fire. 1, 2, 3.... I'm trying.

I'll Be Talking To Ya xxx

Take My Breath Away, I'm A Supernova....

Update time. Nothing new really, just the same old, same old. There lies the problem, in having nothing groundbreaking occur it feels like a lot has happend. You live, you learn. Isn't that right. Aww who knows ! Basicly i'm fucking fed-up ... Again ! It's feeling like the constant tide has more or les just settled for now, i honestly can't see anything, or make that anyone (maybe) on the horizon. And that never bodes well for me does it ?

If things aren't in flux i'm fucked (could be a new motta that) and it's leading up to that. I had plans, great big fucking ambitious plans, for the start of this uni year, but by this point already, it's mostly fallen by the wayside. Everyone has found a groove, a rythm and a purpose. And i'm feeling kinda left out, i'm not soo much integral as external. I don't really need to be there now. I have nothing to pull me in. There are literaly people who want me to just fuck of, just get ghost. And yeah i deserve it ! i feel fucking bad. i say the wrong things, at the wrong times. I'm relentless in my constant pursuit of something better, the next big chapter so to speak. And in doing so maybe i do bulldose over the few people who i should stop and thank and then apologise too. The under-appreciated. I genuinally am kept sane by these mofo's and the only credit i ever give back is by walking all over them at every opportunity. Act first, feel bad later ! That's total bullshit isn't it ! All i can say is that i mean well, but in a fight between doing the right thing, and engaging my massive fucking ego, i constantly lose track of what is happening. And then spend days regreting it. Feeling a complete and utter wanker ! I am trying now though, i am doing my best to be good. I like being good to people. It makes me feel decent and also i enjoy it. in the right company, i find everything fun. This week i've smiled more then i have for a long, long time. And two people are to thank for that. I wish i could than them both. He knows, of course he does. That boy is like my emotional barrier, he keeps me safe so he does. She has everyright to murder me, but still tries to be nice to me ! I honestly don't get it ! I don't deserve shit ! But i get to hear nice things, and she should be thanked, and loved. But i don't have the balls to say that, or even show that. Except maybe here. Maybe ?

What the fuck else then... Could the apprentice be moving on from the master, and in doing so, taking some of his ideas with him. Surely not ! Well..... ? I'm not so sure, the banker, the one i was sure of, ever so sure. My first priority if you will... BOOM ! Looks to be gone, swept up in a cloud of him ! I don't get it, i'm happy about it though, i don't deserve another go at that game, and this guy is awesome. He's far more inclined to not fuck it up so all the best, i'm gonna make this happen for you sir, even if i'm lost in the muck doing it. But i'm not gonna be sitting on my ass waiting on any runner up prize. Not at all, when the shit hits the fan (And when does it never) there will be a new competition, and a new numero uno. What i couldn't possibly say ! But i'll cross that bridge only when the paths flooded, at the moment the land seems firm. But for how much longer ? Theres gotta be something coming soon.... A Big black cloud of mystery. Or atleast a sniff of a chase. That is all it takes, get me to engage, and i can still run with the best of them. I don't think my confidence has ever been this fucking low. I can barely look in the mirror without wanting to punch myself (Which i done by the way, and yes it does fucking hurt !) i've annoyed me. It's like everything that i had going for me has pissed of someplace, i'm no longer commanding attention, the interest, the questions have been replaced by a kinda nonchelance. Yes that's him, yeah we know and yup we think he's a cock too. Sums up the worlds approach to the Steve dilemma at this moment in hstory.

This can all of course change fast though, fast like the flash ! I just need a change of some sort, a slight rumble in the jungle. And all will be back to usual. I just wanna be able to say 'Steve is back' and that will be a god damm relief ! It has been too long now, i've just been a shadow of what i was, and this shit doesn't sit well. I suppose its time to find some confidence. Wait for it, it's coming... i know it ! It always is, lull before a storm. Perhaps ? I hope so, i need so. So time to introduce a little anarchy, time to let chaos come down on all this. And maybe, just maybe, it's that time again. To set the mother fucking house on fire. 1, 2, 3.... I'm trying.

I'll Be Talking To Ya xxx

Satellite

The band satellite have written a song. That song is called 'Ring The Bells', and that song is being reprinted on the inside of the new TWLOHA (To write love on her arms) T-shirts that they are now sellling. The song itself is some kinda beautiful, and if you get the chance i'd ask everyone to check out the site, maybe buy a shirt, and spread the word. Enjoy dear readers :)

http://www.twloha.com/


'Find the words that make it right again
Calling birds help you make it through the night
It's just enough to find a way to open up once again
And learn to take all the beauty that's inside


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight


Scream out loud
Until you feel again
And hear the sound of how to heal an achin heart
And those that know you most
Can help you to live again
So keep the close
As you're making your new start


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight


The day you finally turn to dust
And finally hear your name
Brings colors that will never fade away
Sometimes the best in all of us
Can still break down and still give up on love
But it's never gone


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight' .


I'll be talkin to yaa XxX

Satellite

The band satellite have written a song. That song is called 'Ring The Bells', and that song is being reprinted on the inside of the new TWLOHA (To write love on her arms) T-shirts that they are now sellling. The song itself is some kinda beautiful, and if you get the chance i'd ask everyone to check out the site, maybe buy a shirt, and spread the word. Enjoy dear readers :)

http://www.twloha.com/


'Find the words that make it right again
Calling birds help you make it through the night
It's just enough to find a way to open up once again
And learn to take all the beauty that's inside


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight


Scream out loud
Until you feel again
And hear the sound of how to heal an achin heart
And those that know you most
Can help you to live again
So keep the close
As you're making your new start


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight


The day you finally turn to dust
And finally hear your name
Brings colors that will never fade away
Sometimes the best in all of us
Can still break down and still give up on love
But it's never gone


Well ring the bells that lead you home
Cause the only truth I've ever known
Is that nothing ever hurts us more than love
So circle up your best friends
And we'll celebrate the way it ends
Atleast we live tonight
Atleast we live tonight' .


I'll be talkin to yaa XxX

Better Weather

This is a song by the Scottish band Twin Atlantic. There is something entirely lovely about the lyrics. I don;t quite understand what it is, as the song itself itn't all that fantastic. But i suppose the words just really connect with me. The imagery that they conjure is something special and for this the band deserve praise.

'Dearest forgetful,



Here are my guilty hands,


And you take them across your eyes,


They help you remember




This is not a dream,


Could it get any better?


We'll wait out the winter nights,


And laugh along with the better weather.




And we'll forever be in disguise


We're pushing back in the shadows


To help us realize


And we'll forever be in disguise


We're pushing back in the shadows


To help us realize




My science is the answer


You both can play a part in my game.


On chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos rain


On chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos rain




I've been making meadows


I've been making meadows


In the sky


In the sky




With the seeds,


From your eyes


From your eyes


Dearest forgetful,


Here are my guilty hands,


Take them across your eyes,


So you can remember


This is not a dream,


Could it get any better?


We'll wait out the winter nights,


And laugh along with the better weather.'
 
 
-Twin Atlantic
 
 
I'll be talkin to ya xxx

Better Weather

This is a song by the Scottish band Twin Atlantic. There is something entirely lovely about the lyrics. I don;t quite understand what it is, as the song itself itn't all that fantastic. But i suppose the words just really connect with me. The imagery that they conjure is something special and for this the band deserve praise.

'Dearest forgetful,



Here are my guilty hands,


And you take them across your eyes,


They help you remember




This is not a dream,


Could it get any better?


We'll wait out the winter nights,


And laugh along with the better weather.




And we'll forever be in disguise


We're pushing back in the shadows


To help us realize


And we'll forever be in disguise


We're pushing back in the shadows


To help us realize




My science is the answer


You both can play a part in my game.


On chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos rain


On chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos, chaos rain




I've been making meadows


I've been making meadows


In the sky


In the sky




With the seeds,


From your eyes


From your eyes


Dearest forgetful,


Here are my guilty hands,


Take them across your eyes,


So you can remember


This is not a dream,


Could it get any better?


We'll wait out the winter nights,


And laugh along with the better weather.'
 
 
-Twin Atlantic
 
 
I'll be talkin to ya xxx

Eternal Sunshine

'How happy is the blameless vestal's lot !
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind !
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd...'

- Alexander Pope

I'll Be Talkin To Ya xx